Best Collar Stays (and Why Your Bow Tie Collar Needs Them)

Here is a detail most men never think about until a photo proves them wrong: a limp, curling collar. It is even more noticeable with a bow tie, because nothing covers the collar points. The fix costs a few dollars and takes five seconds. It is called a collar stay, and this guide covers which ones are worth buying and how to use them.

What Are Collar Stays?

Collar stays are thin, flat strips of plastic or metal that slide into small pockets on the underside of your shirt collar, one on each side. They run from the fold of the collar to the tip of each point and keep the points straight, flat and sharp. Most dress shirts come with cheap plastic stays that go missing in the first wash. If yours have vanished, that is why your collar has started to curl.

Why a Bow Tie Collar Needs Them More

With a long necktie, the knot fills the space between your collar points and the tie holds them down against your chest. A bow tie sits higher, right at the collar band, and leaves the points on their own. Without stays they drift outward, flip up, or bow in the middle, and the whole look goes from sharp to sloppy. Stays keep the points lying flat on either side of the bow, which is how a bow tie is meant to be framed.

It matters most with the collars that suit bow ties best: spread and semi-spread collars, which have wide, exposed points. (Not sure which collar you have? See our guide to dress shirt collar types.)

Plastic vs. Metal Collar Stays

• Plastic: what comes with most shirts. They are light and fine for a day, but they warp in the dryer and bend over time.
• Brass or stainless steel: the upgrade. Metal stays are heavier, so they hold the points down with a little weight, and they stay perfectly straight for years. They are the best choice for most men.
• Magnetic: a stay with a small magnet under the shirt that holds the point in place. They work, but magnets are not recommended for anyone with a pacemaker or other implanted medical device.

What Size Collar Stays Do You Need?

Collar stays usually come in lengths between about 2 and 3 inches. Measure the pocket under your collar point, or simply check the old stay if you still have it. As a rule of thumb, spread collars take shorter stays (around 2 to 2.25 inches) and point collars take longer ones (around 2.5 to 2.75 inches). The easiest option is a set with several sizes, so you have the right stay for every shirt in the closet.

How to Use Collar Stays

1. Find the pockets. Flip the collar and look for small slits near the fold on the underside of each point.
2. Slide the stay in, rounded end first. The rounded tip goes toward the collar point. Push it all the way down so it sits flat.
3. Match left and right. Use the same length on both sides so the points sit symmetrically around your bow tie.
4. Tie your bow tie, then check the points. They should lie flat against your shirt and just touch or sit close to the collar band on either side of the knot.
5. Take them out before washing. Metal stays can mark the fabric in the wash, and pressing a collar with stays inside can leave an outline. Remove them, then put them back after ironing.

Common Collar Stay Mistakes

• Leaving stays in the shirt through the washer and dryer.
• Using stays that are too long, which pushes the fabric out into a visible bump.
• Trying to add stays to a button-down collar. Button-downs are held by their buttons and do not have stay pockets.
• Ignoring a wrinkled collar. Stays keep the shape, but they will not fix creases. Give the collar a quick press or steam first.

Once the collar is sorted, the only thing left is the bow tie itself. Browse our bow ties or, for something a little more special, our Luxe collection.

The Bottom Line

A bow tie leaves your collar points exposed, so they need to stay sharp. Buy a set of metal collar stays in a few sizes, match them left and right, and take them out before every wash. It is the cheapest upgrade in menswear, and you will notice it in every photo.

More Bow Tie Guides

• Bow Ties With Shirts
• Dress Shirt Collar Types
• Bow Ties With Suits
• Wing Collar Shirts: The Black-Tie Guide
• Tuxedo Accessories Checklist